Alexa Succeeds Where I Can't (Behavioral Science)

Thinking about "task interruption" and "transition warning" and "neutral third-party" and "unconscious conditioning" I've stumbled onto something that's been really helpful with our non-verbal child.

 

There will be times when he needs a diaper change but doesn't want a change.  If I'm pretty sure he needs one but I ask him and he says no, I'll ask "do you need a timer?" and he'll respond affirmatively.

 

I'll say "Alexa, set a timer for x" where x is anywhere from 2 minutes all the way down to 2 seconds, depending on what his mood looks like, it he needs a cooldown or if he's already 99% ready to go.

 

When the timer goes off, he often hops right up and goes to his room. Sometimes I'll have to point out the timer has gone off, but then he's compliant and we'll go in and get the diaper taken care of. But because it's not me making the demand but Alexa, he can't fight or protest. (And he knows Alexa will just keep sounding the alarm without getting tired until we turn it off.)

 

(When we were recently on vacation, I didn't have Alexa and I had to mimic the Alexa voice and the doo doo doo sound myself but it still worked.)

The Chain Reaction

Rachel went to sleep around 7:30, woke up at 10:30 pm and then apparently stayed up all night long working on her play.  So today, she's having a little trouble.  She just bumped something and said "Ow.  (pause)  I know.  I didn't sleep enough so I'm tired.  And that makes me cranky and hurt myself.  And that makes me act like a little girl.  Which makes you treat me like a little girl.  That's the 'Little Girl Chain Reaction.'"

That is exciting progress to witness.

Parents Magazine - June 2011

cross-posting on tvjames x blog

I've always intended to read Parents magazine when it arrives (we've subscribed for years), but it usually just ends up on my wife's nightstand and I never get to it. But this time, I left it in my car until I had time to read it. It is obviously aimed at women, from the articles to the advertising.

I don't think they'd show as many ads with women wearing almost nothing if they thought men were reading the magazine. I think more men would read the magazine if they knew how much skin was shown.

The magazine also has a really annoying habit of starting articles on the left side of a page with an ad on the right. I think the whole design of the magazine is to make it as difficult as possible to determine what's an ad and what's content. On one hand, shame on you. On the other, well-played.

I read it rather quickly in one afternoon and here's the stuff that stood out to me.

Raise a Kid Who Gives -- Is this really worth it? I wondered, as I directed my girls -- Drew, 3, and Blair, 5 -- to carry the unwrapped present we were donating to a needy child their preschool had chosen to help last December. Even though I had explained the situation to them a bunch of times, they still didn't seem to get why they couldn't keep the toy. Read more...

Little Big Fan - an article about a guy who has to start paying attention to sports because his son is interested in sports. Sadly, apparently not available to read online.

A Wall of Silence - about why Post-Partum Depression should be taken seriously -- and not be something that's considered shameful or a failure if you're suffering from. Again, apparently not available online. Lame.

Odds and Ends

The always good reminder of securing your ladders -- and what happened to a child when a parent didn't.

Why kids shouldn't take a sip of water after spitting while brushing their teeth. (Dilutes the fluoride.)

Teaching gratitude early - one mom had recorded her 3-year-old thanking people for his birthday gifts and loaded each as a YouTube video and emailed the link to the gift-givers.

Ha - Even if you breastfeed exclusively, pump and let your husband help - just because you made the meal doesn't mean you have to serve it.

Why kids will eat something at school but not at home - at school they see their friends eating them, but at home, their family members aren't. So if you want him to eat carrot sticks, don't pressure him to, just put them on his plate and yours, too.

Books - I requested these from the library for our daughter.

* Iggy Peck, Architect (Andrea Beaty)
* The Dot (Peter Reynolds)

While most of the magazine isn't actually online, you can read more of the articles from that issue here.

Who's Snowing Who Here?

In April, Rachel asked about the Easter Bunny.  She seemed to really want to know if we were the ones who filled her basket.  I told her that yes, Mommy & Daddy fill her Easter basket every year.  I expected that to be the beginning of a snowball effect where the true identities of Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy came out, too, but she dropped it after confirming the secret identity of just the Bunny.

Today we were on our way to a dental checkup for her when the following conversation occurred:

Rachel: (wiggling her tooth) I'm trying to get my tooth to fall out faster so the Tooth Fairy will come.  You know what I think?  I think you're the Tooth Fairy.  Daddy told me that you two are the Easter Bunny, and I think you're the Tooth Fairy.  (leaning forward) Are you?
Me: Yes, I'm the Tooth Fairy.
Rachel:  Are you guys Cupid?
Me: Yes, we're Cupid.
Rachel:  You're the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and Cupid.  Everyone but Santa Claus.

Uh, what?  I'm trying to decide if she really does think that Santa Claus is the only genuine holiday character and we only pretend to be the others, or if she enjoys believing in Santa so much that she's purposely denying that he doesn't exist.  Or, option 3 - she realizes that if Santa doesn't exist, Santa gifts don't appear on Christmas morning in addition to the gifts from Mommy & Daddy.

I don't think she's crafty enough to have figured that out so quickly, unless this is something she's been thinking about for a while.  But even then, I don't think she would purposely pretend to be clueless just for the extra gifts.

Still, it makes one wonder.