The Waiting Game

I think now is the hardest part of pregnancy for me. I'm actually feeling less physically miserable at this point than I did the first time around, although I am fairly uncomfortable now and continuing to sleep poorly most nights. But the hard part is just...waiting.

I'm 37 1/2 weeks, which means I'm full-term and technically, could go into active labor at any time. So every little twinge, every back pain, every time I start having semi-regular contractions makes me think "Is this it?" And then it's not. I know I'll recognize full-blown labor once it actually starts, but it's the not knowing and waiting to find out if what seems like labor really is labor that's driving me a little batty.

Sunday night, I had back pain for about 3 hours that just started getting worse. It was accompanied by contractions that didn't subside when I laid down, which usually stops false labor contractions. I started to think it was go-time. I even had to get out of bed at 2am to sit against a heating pad because the back pain was so bad, and had about 6 sizeable contractions in half an hour. I went back to bed after an hour since the heating pad had helped my back pain quite a bit. I figured that, if it was true labor, I'd wake up when the pain got bad enough.

Woke up around 6am and told James that it might be a good idea for him to work from home on Monday, just in case this was the real thing and things were ramping up soon. So he stayed home and worked from here, and I went back to sleep for a while. Got up, took Rachel to preschool and went to a doctor's appointment where they monitored the contractions, and I was indeed having them pretty regularly. They were fairly strong as well. But unfortunately, things tapered off later in the morning, and I was just having sporadic contractions throughout the day.

Now I feel like it's probably not going to happen all that soon. I know things can change on a dime and it could still be any time. And I realize that 2 1/2 weeks is not very long to wait. I doubt they'll have me go past my due date because of the gest. diabetes. Still, it's a little discouraging and frustrating to just have to wait and not now when things will happen, especially now that we have a daughter to worry about when it's time for us to go to the hospital. We've had several people offer to watch her if needed, but most are tied up on weekdays, at least until the early afternoon, so we'll have to see how things play out. I'm sure we'll have a place for her when we need it; worst case scenario, she'll go to the hospital with us and James will hang out with her until someone can pick her up. So it would be nice if labor would happen at a time when someone's available to be with Rachel, but we'll just have to WAIT and see what happens.

I hate waiting.

Could Be Any Time, Could Be 3 1/2 Weeks

My due date is 3 1/2 weeks from today. Not all that far, but I've been feeling like Ben isn't going to wait that long. I had contractions off and on throughout the weekend, but particularly on Friday night (every 3 to 5 minutes for 4 hours, except when I would lay down) and during the day on Saturday. I know it was false labor because it would subside when I laid down, but one of these times, it's going to be the real thing.

He's pushing so hard that it makes me think he's trying to find his way out. We've considered using a flashlight to help him figure it out, but I don't know how effective that would be. I had a nonstress test at the doctor's office this morning (they've been monitoring fetal movement and heartrate because of my gestational diabetes) and briefly spoke to the doctor. She said it could be another week or two. Then again, could be longer. She did some feeling of my abdomen and thinks he's about 5 pounds; she also thought he may have turned breech, but I'll have an actual exam on Friday and I think she'll know more then. I've been feeling lots of kicking up high, so I think he's still head down like he's supposed to be. I'm not going to worry about it unless I find out I have reason to. And even then, worrying isn't going to change things, so what's the point?

At any rate, we're getting very close to the end, perhaps closer than we know. No nursery still and we won't be able to get one ready for a while, but my mom did find a part-time job so is hopefully on her way to filling in the rest of the time and finding her own place so we get the room back. Other than that, we're preparing the best we can. We have a temporary space for the changing table, a co-sleeper in our room, playyard in the living room, cradle for the family room downstairs, diapers and wipes on hand, a small supply of 2-oz. formula bottles for desperate nights when I need a break, plenty of baby clothes...I'm working on getting the miscellaneous baby items cleaned up and/or washed in the laundry - things like the baby bathtub, Baby Bjorn carrier, activity gym, bottles, breast pump, and all the other things I just dug out of the crawlspace and the garage.

Our church is throwing us a baby shower this Saturday. Hopefully I'll be able to attend, unless Ben decides to be born then. And James' work is giving us a shower next Thursday, 5/1. I'm a little more dubious about making it until then, but we'll see. Ben may surprise me and end up deciding to wait until his due date (5/16) after all.

So we're feeling pretty good in terms of preparedness and we feel ready to welcome Ben any time he decides to make his appearance! I'm definitely feeling like I've moved past the fear of labor pain to "I'd like him out now," so that's good in terms of mental preparation, I think. Every day he waits is a day to get a few more things crossed off of my to-do list and to be even more prepared, so I'll try not to be impatient and just see what happens.

Rachel's Law of Time

No matter how much time remains and how ready she is at the start of breakfast, Rachel will dawdle long enough to cause tardiness to ensue.

Testing... 1... 2... 3...

Testing the "Blog It" application from TypePad on Facebook to post to three different Blogger blogs and a LiveJournal blog and update my Facebook, Twitter and Pownce status all at once.